Those Cunning Folk
by LittleMissDementorsKiss
Summary: When OC Maya Clyde meets Scorpius Malfoy, she instantly fell in hate with him. When they're chosen to be head girl and boy and she misses a meeting with the headmaster, Malfoy decides to use any means to acheive his ends
1. Preface

**As a disclaimer: I do not own the rights to any recognisable characters, names, spells, curses, other incantations, magical objects, magical titles, terms of endearment, or the word Merlin as a profanity/explanation of surprise or frustration. I have taken the liberty to make several pop-culture references. Again, these are property of their respective creators/managers. I have quoted a 'Things I Will Not Do at Hogwarts' and that also is property of the creator. I am not making any material profit, monetary or otherwise (enjoyment and happiness do not count as material) from this production. I am not meaning to infringe on anyone's claims to these words. If you see something I missed, let me know.**

**I have made a few of my own characters**

**I have rated this M for language and innuendo only. This is not another way to say MA. There is nothing explicit in this. **

**And now, your feature presentation**

It was seven years from last week that I came to Hogwarts. Seven years and seven days since I slid into the compartment. I would have asked the other occupant if he minded, but since the door had been unlatched and everywhere else was full I didn't bother. It didn't seem to matter anyway. He didn't even notice me. He just kept staring out the window at the dreary, overcast countryside. With nothing better to do, I looked out the rain-spattered window as well.

"I wonder if I should take this as an omen." I said before I could stop myself. This stranger obviously didn't care about anything I had to say. He didn't even bother glancing my way, let alone formulating a response. Was this normal Hogwarts behaviour? I certainly hoped not. I didn't want this experience to be any harder than it already was.

Harvey had found Selwyn rather quickly. Our first day in Diagon Alley, he'd been sitting at the table next to us at the ice cream parlor when he overheard our conversation, which consisted mostly of Harvey complaining about the move. Sel had reassured my brother that Hogwarts was great and he shouldn't worry. So obviously it was just this one guy who found it fine to ignore me. I turned to look back out the window when I noticed it. On the front of my compartment-mates tee shirt was a green and silver coat of arms. It was turned to the wall of the compartment, but my movement had allowed the window to give me a glimpse of reflection.

I had promised myself I wasn't going to go hating Slytherin before I'd had a chance to form my own opinions. Of course, I knew I would end up disliking them anyway. According to Selwyn, everyone but Slytherin hated Slytherin. As a muggle-born, I'd definitely be in a house where that'd rub off on me. This guy wasn't helping.

I pulled my pin-straight caramel-brown hair out of my face with an elastic band and leaned my forehead against the cool glass of the window. I closed my eyes.

"Are you nervous?" My compartment-mate asked suddenly.

"Yeah." I said shortly.

"Well, I'm not. My dad says that with a name like Malfoy I'll be immediately respected. I know I'll be in Slytherin. My cousin said it's the best house, and of course he's right." He looked at me smugly.

"Oh, right. You guys are all cousins over in that house, right?" I said back. I knew my smart-ass behavior wasn't doing me any good, but I couldn't help it. Selwyn hated Slytherin, and he'd given Harvey and me all the information we needed to formulate insults.

Two satisfyingly bright pink splotches appeared on his cheeks, a dramatic contrast to his blond hair and pale angular face.

"And you're all of tainted ancestry in the others." He said, regaining his figurative footing rather quickly.

"Tell me, Malfoy." I said "If your mum and dad divorced, would they still be brother and sister?"

"Do you have any idea who you're talking to?" He asked angrily.

"No, you failed to mention anything beyond your last name." I said sharply

"You should recognize that name! Unless…" A look on his face showed me too clearly that he'd just deduced that I was a muggle-born. "Not even half and half, are you? You sick little mudblood." He said smugly.

"At least I have a soul."

"Barely." He retorted.

"You know what, Malfoy—" I said, but was interrupted by a voice that sounded like a voice that announced that we had arrived. Everyone stood and started to file off of the train. I met up with my twin brother Harvey and went to a man who was calling the first years to him.

A spherical kind-looking woman that slightly resembled Muriel from Courage the Cowardly Dog told us what was going to be going on during the sorting ceremony, then left us to wait until I was sure I was going to a school that specialised in mental and emotional torture.

Then the same woman, Professor Varity, came back and led us into the great hall, where we were sorted.

Clyde, Harvey and Clyde, Maya were, as I had been dreading, near the very first to be called. Harvey and I were both sent to Gryffindor. I learned that Malfoy's first name was Scorpius (what kind of crappy parent names his son something like that) and that he was right about being put in Slytherin.

I still hadn't let up on my hatred of Slytherin, but I felt so bad for Kaylee Thomson, a newly sorted girl with a horrible lisp. Poor girl couldn't even say the name of her house. Thi-thi-thin

A peppy, pigtailed, sunburned girl named Rose was one of the few non-Slytherins who knew what house she'd be in, and when the hat announced GRYFFINDOR! She ran right up to a group of people she already knew. Selwyn started talking with her, and Harvey and I just kept to ourselves. Soon the sorting was over and the feast began.

I must have eaten, but I don't remember that part. I know I slept, but I don't remember that part either. I only remember waking up the next morning ready to learn.


	2. Chapter I

**Okeedokee. I hope everyone likes it so far. I just realised that there is a character of JK Rowling's that is named Selwyn. I don't feel like changing his name, but the Selwyn in this story is an original character who is of no correlation to the death eater in HPatDH.**

**Oh, I also realised that my timeline was messed up (geeze, I'm SO FREAKING slow) so Lily was NOT sorted the same year as Maya and Harvey. So if you'll just replace Lily with Rose in the previous chapter all should be well. I'll actually change it when I get the chance.**

**Edit: It's been changed**

Seven years had changed a lot of things. School wide heartthrob James Potter had graduated. Al and I were dating, but I never got to see him since he didn't come to school (the supergenius child prodigy graduated early, that show off), and it was putting an intense strain on our relationship (especially considering his aforementioned heartthrob status and my paranoid personality). At least Hogsmead outings let us have some "quality time" together, and sometimes he came to visit. Lily Potter was dating my brother, which was kind of awkward since she was my best friend. Rose and Sel were engaged right after he graduated and were getting married that coming summer.

And oh yeah... I talked to Scorpius Malfoy on a regular basis.

It wasn't by choice, of course. When I'd gotten my letter that made me head girl, I was ecstatic. I always knew I had good grades and was eligible but as an American who, if it weren't for my mum's remarriage just before my first year, would have attended The Salem Witches Institute of Academia, I wasn't expecting anything of the sort.

I was happy, though. For six years, at least, I'd gotten to stay in the same house with Harvey, who would otherwise have gone to Boston's Wizarding Academy. And I still hung out in the Gryffindor common room as much as possible in attempt to maintain my sanity.

But it was unavoidable that I speak with Scorpie Dearest, which I called him purely for the sake of annoying him. It didn't really roll off of the tongue, and no matter how it was said it could never sound endearing in the slightest.

Besides Heads Business, our 'conversations', if you could call them that, were a mere exchange of two or three word sentences and usually went on for about two seconds.

I used several avoidance manoeuvres on a daily basis. The first was a fairly simple muggle remedy for the horrible roommate: I confined myself to my room and locked the door. Sure, it made for an almost meaningless existence outside classes, but it was effective. As a backup plan, I had wards on the door and window.

Mr. Potter had taught them to me. They were originally used to keep a space safe from anyone with a dark mark, but he'd altered them to keep out people of any category I liked. I had set them to shock the living daylights out of any beings that had untrustworthy intent, kind of like an electric fence made of sneakascopes.

Unfortunately, Malfoy was clever. I was reading when he figured out how to get around the guards. Somehow, the jerk-off had learned how to make a full on corporal patronus, the purest thing in existence, and the wizarding equivalent of a cell phone. So when that freaking glow-ey snake slithered oh so nonchalantly under my door I was royally pissed.

I couldn't particularly find a way around it. Blocking patronuses would not only block Malfoy's, but Rose's, Lily's, and Harvey's as well. So I had to deal with the daily annoyances. It's not like he said anything, but you try focusing on homework when a bright silver snake is staring at you. It was like psychological warfare. I managed to keep my grades up, but not by much.

=%=

"Hey, Clyde! Wait up!" I head behind me as I walked down the wide hallway on my way to class. I kept moving. I wasn't about to take any time out of my day to wait for Malfoy. But when I heard his footsteps quicken and come closer, I stopped. Malfoy was a quidditch boy, and with his muscles fine tuned to keep his broom steady, there was absolutely no way I was going to get away. I whirled around just as he caught up.

"Rule one of dealing with me, as I've repeatedly told you, is to never, ever, _ever _call me Clyde." I said. I had my wand out and pointed oh so nonchalantly at his man-parts (coincidence, I swear) and he backed up slightly. But it didn't stop him from arguing.

"You call me Malfoy." He pointed out, just as he always did.

"It's different. I am a _girl_. Clyde is a legitimate_ boy's_ name. As much as I wish to remain as detached from you as possible, I'd appreciate it if you use my first name." I retaliated, just as I always did.

"Whatever, _Maya_." He said, putting unnecessary emphasis on my name.

"Sufficient." I relented, sighing. "Now what do you want."

"I want to know where on God's good green earth you were this morning." He said

"Oh, shit!" I said, giving myself a facepalm. "We had a meeting, didn't we."

"With McGonagall every Friday just after breakfast. You know this, Maya. Why were you gone."

"I totally forgot." I said "Shit. What did she say."

"I covered for you. Told her that Rose was having relationship issues and was contemplating suicide."

"You what?" I practically screamed, my jaw dropping. "You told a downright lie compromising the administration-allowed freedom of my best friend and the security of Selwyn's life to the headmaster. You idiot!"

"Hold it. I said you had it taken care of, that Weasley and Greene were back together, and you just needed to be left alone while you caught up on your sleep. You know, the sleep you missed last night as you were helping your friend."

I sighed. It would work as well as anything that dumb-ass would ever think of, and maybe, just maybe, if McGonagall thought all was well then it could be mostly forgotten.

"Thanks, Malfoy." I said, almost gagging as the horrid words exited my mouth.

"Yeah, sure. You owe me one, though."

"Seriously?" Despite the fact that this was Malfoy I was dealing with, I was surprised.

"Yes, Seriously."

"Fine." I said "But make it quick. I have divination next, and since Trelawney predicted that by lunch today I'd be unconscious and in the hospital wing, I can't wait to see her reaction now that we're two classes 'til supper and I'm still feeling peachy."

"Peachy?" He said, smirking at her word choice.

"Well, at least I was before you came and started blabbing to me. What is it you want me to do, Malfoy. I want to get this over with."

"Do you, now?"

"Yes. I do. Are you going to let me know what it is that I'm to be getting over with?"

"Nah, I think I'll keep you guessing. But hey, maybe you'll see it in your crystal ball." He 'reassured' me as he backed down the hall, laughing

I swivelled on my heel and rushed through the hallway, which was noticeably less crowded than it had been when she first started her conversation.

"Damn it! Damn it, damn it, damn it." I was going to be late. I prayed vehemently to whoever had the golden nameplate on his heavenly desk that Peeves wasn't around, that he was bothering someone else so that maybe, maybe, if I ran I could make it to class. I felt a little bit guilty about wishing Peeves' mischief upon another person, but it soon passed. Everyone knew that the bloody baron would take care of anything that got too out of hand. He may be the Slytherin ghost, but he had as much distaste for the poltergeist as everyone else in the entire freaking universe.

Luckily, I did make it to class on time, if only barely. Trelawney explained my continued attendance with a vague "The spirits are confused at times of great peril" spawning a sarcastic whisper of "what about times of minimum peril" that she either didn't hear or ignored.

I began to zone out, contemplating what Malfoy could possibly want. Luckily, Trelawney didn't care. Unlike the other teachers, she got excited when a blank look was displayed on any of our faces. She rushed over and stared at us until we looked her in the eyes, then asked what we saw. She was always convinced that the presence of her in the room sparked our inner eye and that anyone looking blankly into space was having a premonition. Spew any dark, depressing garbage and you're safe.

So after claiming that someone, the spirits were unclear who, but _someone_ would get a T in one of their classes, I was finally freed from class and everyone emptied out and went to their dorms for free time. I was relieved beyond belief. I was tired enough that my brain could be used as an elephant sedative. I knew how uncomfortable robes were to sleep in, the fastenings always digging into your chest and abdomen, so I quickly pulled them off, donned a pair of ubercomfy bright blue sweatpants and a plain black cami, and plopped facefirst onto my still made bed. I was almost asleep when I heard a loud rap on the door.

"I know you're in there Maya. Come out, I want to talk to you" Malfoy's voice beckoned. Frowning, I stood up and walked to the door.

"You can't even let me sleep, can you."

"Nope"

"How can you be so awake after a day like this."

"It's a gift, I wield it proudly."

"Whatever." I said. "What is it."

"Come out here."

I stepped through the doorway. "Happy?"

"No. Follow me."

"Can I change back into my clothes first?"

"Quickly." He said, frowning at the prospect of having to wait.

So I changed and followed him until he stopped in front of an empty wall in an empty hallway. The room of requirement. He paced a bit in front of the wall and a door appeared. He opened it.

"After you." He said, sweeping his arm widely before ending up pointing inside of the room.

I walked in and he followed, closing the door behind him.

"Where are we, Malfoy?"

"We are in an untraceable room. Now sit"

I walked over to where a few cushy chairs were, in front of a fireless fireplace, and waited. After some time of nothing, I spoke up.

"Are you going to tell me what you want, or will I have to guess."

He took a deep breath. "I want to propose to you in the great hall at dinner and I want you to accept."

"Pardon?" I asked, sure I misheard even though I had no idea what he could have said.

"Don't freak out. We don't have to get married, just be engaged."

"You lost me." I said.

"OK, so I really, really like Olive Mitchell, but my father _hates_ her. He'd never let me go out with her."

"So..." I said, putting the pieces together, "You think that with marriage to a muggle-born imminent, he'll allow you to date pureblood Olive as long as you break up with me."

"Exactly." He nodded.

"No" I declined. "That's stupid."

"No, it's not. I'll break off the engagement as soon as Father allows me to date Olive."

"No."

"If you don't, I'll tell McGonagall every single rule you've ever broken and you'll be expelled immediately."

The idea terrified me. I couldn't be expelled, my mother would dismember me and throw my remains in the compost bin. But if Malfoy went through with the threat, it was totally plausible. Malfoy knew more than enough to kill my chances of graduating.

"Fine." I said morosely.

"Good." He said smugly.

"Is 'good' the new synonym for 'the most horrible, sickening, terrifying, abhorrent thing I've ever agreed to?" I asked

"Yes it is." He said. "Especially since I'm going to have to kiss you.

"Oh, hell no!" I exclaimed. There was no way this was happening. "You can propose to me. I'll even allow a hug, but unless you want me to vomit all over your mouth, you'll give up on the idea of your lips coming in contact with any part of my person."

"It's got to be realistic." He protested. "I'm not too keen on the idea either. I'll even do it before we eat so there'll be nothing for you to vomit."

"And then we'll go hungry, our appetites being gone."

"We'll stop by the kitchens when we've recovered."

"I will never recover."

"I know. But where's that Gryffindor courage your lot is always going on about. Are you to _scared _to kiss me?"

"No" I snapped.

"Then prove it"

I bit my lip, trying not to pull an 'accio murder weapon'

"Fine." I said. "_One_ kiss. One _chaste_ kiss, like you'd kiss your mother."

"How do you know my kisses with my mother are chaste? He asked.

"O my god!" I gasped, actually puking in my mouth a little as I took a few steps back.

"Kidding, kidding." He said, laughing and holding his arms up as if surrendering or perhaps shielding himself from my disgust. "I can't believe you actually took that seriously. It's kind of insulting."

"It doesn't matter if you were kidding. You still tattooed an image on my brain that I will never, ever be able to erase without obliviating my entire existence. I am supervising you brushing your teeth before dinner."

I was standing up with my wand in his face by this point. He just smirked, unfazed. I, on the other hand, was entirely fazed. I was in the room of requirement with a crazy man. I was going to be murdered, brutally, brutally killed and no one would ever find my body.

OK, maybe I was getting carried away. No need to worry. I would just back up slowly until I reached the door on nonchalant step at a time.

Which was a great plan until it morphed into an instinctual and very chalant burst for the door.

Which Malfoy, being insane but far from stupid, noticed. I fell flat on my face as he put me in a leglock curse mid-stride. I managed to flip myself over and look him in the eye.

"No one can know." He said threateningly.

"My friends won't tell." I protested. There was no way I was letting the Potters or the Weasleys think I had the hots for Scorpius Malfoy.

"No, they won't. And you know why? Because no one is going to tell them.

"It's not worth it." I decided.

"You sure? Because I could get you arrested."

"Oh, please" I scoffed. "I've done things to get me expelled, but illegal's a stretch, don't you think?"

"So you _were_ seventeen when you had certain intimate relations with that Ravenclaw in fifth year? Because statutory rape is illegal, in case you were unaware." My eyes widened and he grinned.

"How do you know about that?" I whispered.

"For future reference, it is against Sir Cadogan's 'code of honour' to lie when asked a direct question."

Damn it. Devil rot it all. Then I realised something.

"Malfoy, why did you ask Sir Cadogan if I was having sex with Lucas Smith?"

"I didn't. I asked where Lucas was. He was my tutor for history, as in I paid him to write those impossible essays Binns assigns. Cadogan said he saw you two entering the room of requirement in permanent liplock with your shirt half unbuttoned. I put the pieces together." He shrugged. "Finite incantum." He released me from my leglock, but before I could leave he grabbed my arm.

"What?"

He didn't answer, but rather ruffled my hair, untucked and wrinkled my shirt, and turned my skirt so it was almost backwards and the seam was in the wrong place.

"Oh, no you don't." I said threateningly.

"Oh, yes I do." He replied, running his fingers backwards through his own hair and removing his tie.

I gave him my death glare, but he just continued without noticing.

"Here's the plan." He said as he unbuttoned his shirt and began to rebutton it so that the buttons were in the wrong holes and didn't line up at the collar. "we wait here until the dinner bell rings, then we leave, making sure to rush to catch up to the rest of the crowd. As we enter the great hall, you 'surreptitiously' smooth out your hair as I 'surreptitiously' fix my tie. Don't tell your friends anything, leave them to form their own conclusions."

"I see a slight snag in this plan." I said "Their own conclusions with conclude that I'm cheating on Al. Lily is a blabbermouth and James is overprotective of his brother and unafraid to hit a girl. I'll be murdered."

"Easy fix. You break up with him."

I gaped

"Oh c'mon. Suck it up. Once this is all over with, you can tell him the truth."

"I hate you, Scorpius Malfoy."

"I know, now hand me that fake galleon." He said, holding out his hand.

"How did you—"

"My dad tells stories of how he beat you're friends' parents, and the galleon was buried in them I figured you'd use the same trick to communicate with your soon-to-be ex-boyfriend."

I closed my eyes, already guilty about what I hadn't yet done. I pulled the coin out of my pocket and handed it to him, then turned away so I didn't have to watch him break up with my boyfriend.

"Hmmm, how does 'we're through' sound?" He asked himself. "Maybe... Ooh, here's a good one." I heard him mutter the enchantment on the coin, and when he told it what he wanted it to say I gasped.

"You're a douch bag, Malfoy." I said "Really? 'There's someone else?' I hate you."

"Oh, tsk tsk. You shouldn't speak like that to your soon-to-be-fiancé" He said, scolding me as if I were three years old.

"Shut up." I said, and we waited in silence for the bell to ring.


	3. Chapter II

When the bell did ring, I followed Malfoy's plan to a T, trying not to cry and miraculously succeeding. No tears fell upon my face, though my heart did weep. OK, I'm being overly dramatic. Still, the only words running through my hand as I sat down beside my friends were _'don't cry, don't cry, don't cry, why is Hugo smirking like that, don't cry, oh my god Lily just noticed my skirt was messed up, don't cry'_. Yeah, pretty much like that. I made sure to sit with my back to the Slytherin table so that I didn't find my eyes straying in that forbidden direction.

"You usually cover up much better than this, Maya." Said Rose, gesturing at my attire.

"Huh?" Said I, with my quick reasoning and rapier tongue.

"There are always little things that only we see, being your best friends and stuff. Your lip gloss smeared a little, your pulled back in a ponytail to hide the fact it's been ruffled. But Jeeze, Maya, it's like you didn't even bother trying to hide the fact that you and my cousin just had barf-inducing sex."

That's Rose for you. She didn't use euphemisms or innuendo. Didn't leave anything to implications. She was frank, and she said what she meant.

"I didn't, Rose." I mumbled. "We broke up."

"Oh, I'm so sorry. I know how much you liked him. But don't you worry. I'm sure that he had a good reason. I mean, you don't spend so much time together. None of us really know what's going on in his life. If Sel broke up with me, then I'd assume it was a rough patch in his life and give him time to work through it. Maybe you should do the same for him. Maybe you should give him some time to work out whatever he's going through and...yeah." She seemed to realise she was rambling and shut up, twisting her ring around her finger to keep herself busy.

"_I_ broke up with _him_, Rose." I said softly, and that was when she waterworks began. Soon, my cheeks were soaked.

"What? Why?" Harvey asked, astonished. He knew how much I liked Al.

"I couldn't cause him anymore pain. It's not just about us anymore, and instead of hurting him I decided to go with the easiest thing possible." I said vaguely

"What do you mean, 'It's not just about us anymore'?" Lily asked.

"I realised it wasn't really him I loved. He wooed me. He gave me flowers, wrote me poetry, he's amazing in... well, I realised a while ago that it's been forever since we actually spoke with each other and when I tried to think of what we'd say I came up blank. Believe me, I tried. But it just wouldn't work out."

There. I'd done it. I'd moved from half truths to full on lies. Won't my 'fiancé' be so proud?

"So this happened a while ago?" Lily asked, obviously disappointed that neither I nor her brother had told her.

"I came to this conclusion a while ago. I broke up with him only when I began so seriously consider other plans that didn't include him."

"So you did have barf-inducing sex!" Rose exclaimed, coming to the conclusion rather immediately. What did this say about my personality? Was I really that much of a slut?

"Shut up." I scolded when I saw everyone in earshot look our way. "And yes." I lied.

"But not with Al?" Lily asked

"Not with Al." I clarified.

I had a glimpse from my peripherals that Malfoy was up at the teachers tables, whispering something in McGonagall's ear. I knew what it was. He was asking permission to propose to me— probably not specifically, but rather to talk to me or make an announcement or something— before the food appeared on the table. I wiped my face, glad that my cheeks didn't get red when I cried and that my eyes recovered fairly quickly from their redness soon after I stopped crying. I knew that there was no longer any sign of any previous tears left on my face.

It was time. I managed to not let my panic appear on my face when he tapped me on the shoulder. I turned in my seat and suppressed the natural urge to scowl. He held out his hand for me.

Crap, he wanted me to stand up in front of everyone for this.

If I must.

I took his hand and stood.

"Maya Elizabeth Clyde," He began. When did he learn my middle name? How did he learn my middle name? "A Slytherin and a Gryffindor should never be friends, let alone fall so deep in love. But what we have exceeds what the sorting hat says. It exceeds what blood runs through our veins, what our parents think. So Maya, I say we give up this act. I am no longer afraid to admit our love, and I am ready to go even farther." He had the voice projection of a sports announcer at this point. He got down on one knee and pulled out a small, navy blue, velvet box.

He'd gotten a ring? When did he have time to get a ring?

"Maya, will you let our love be known? Will you accept this proposal of marriage I now offer you?"

I gulped. "Scorpius Hyperion Malfoy," I began. Yes, I did know his middle name. Everyone knows his middle name. "I will. I accept."

I started to cry again and tried to mask the tears as tears of joy with a smile. He took my hand, slid the ring on my finger, and stood.

"Thank you." He said, and it was so full of emotion that he _had_ to be thanking me for keeping my promise, not fake thanking me for marrying him. He hugged me, and I let him, going so far as to wrap my arms back around him. His lips quickly and, thank god, chastely, pressed against mine. However, it wasn't quick enough to stop a bazillion thought from running through my head.

_Oh my God, I'm kissing Scorpius Malfoy_. _I'm kissing the so-called Slytherin Prince, the boy everyone wants to kiss. Please, don't let me puke._

"Thank you." He said again. I nodded and smiled, and he turned back to his table. I sat back down and looked at my friends, who were all gaping at me.

"Wow." I said, hoping I sounded surprised and perhaps a bit overwhelmed, to get them to stop staring at me like that. Food arrived at the table, and I busied myself with filling my plate. I wasn't going to eat. No, I couldn't. I hadn't puked yet, thank God, but I it was still a possibility that I wasn't going to encourage it by filling my stomach.

So I filled my plate for something to do, and for something to do only. When I looked back up, almost everyone was still staring. My best friends and my brother were the only people in the entirety of the great hall that refused to look at me. Harvey was angrily stabbing his green beans, his fork making an audible noise every time it hit the plate. The scowl on his face didn't even dissipate when he put the food in his mouth. He managed to scowl while chewing. Who does that?

Rose had her eyes closed as if she were trying to convince herself she was dreaming.

And Lily, well, Lily was sobbing. There was no food on her plate. She was too busy rubbing her nose on her sleeve and bawling her eyes out to fill it.

"Lily," I said, trying to apologise.

"Shut up. I hate you!" She said, so loudly that everyone who was staring immediately looked away in embarrassment.

"C'mon, Lil. I'm sorry."

"Well, so am I. I'm sorry my family ever burdened you with our existence."

"Lily, you know that's not true." I protested quietly, keeping my voice even

"Isn't it, though? Al wasn't good enough for you. You didn't even bother to tell me how you were feeling, and now these 'plans' you were talking about end up being marriage to Scorpius Fucking Malfoy. I never want to see your ugly face again, you bitch."

Her words stung. Lily never swore, not even in jest. And here she was, using the worst words in the book. She really hated me.

_Did you really expect anything else?_ I reasoned with myself. _Did you think they'd ignore their deep-seeded hatred for Malfoy, ignore their love for their brother, and invite you to sing kumbaya around a campfire?_

Well, when I put it that way…

This sucked. At least I didn't have to sleep in the same room as them.

When dinner was over, I went straight to my room without even waiting for Malfoy. I still hadn't eaten, and I still wasn't hungry. I just wanted to lie down in my bed and cry. I hadn't cried this much since I was born, and I suppose a newborn's cry is more of a wail, isn't it? So in essence, I hadn't cried this much since ever.

And here I was, spending almost half of the day in tears.

I was sobbing loudly, no longer trying to hide my tears, letting them pour down my cheeks in a violently loud potpourri of sobs, sniffles, and screams.

That was, until I heard, over my sobbing, Malfoy voice alohamoring just outside my door. My guards were up, so I paid no notice, until he just strode right in and sat beside me on the bed. That was when I once more contained my loud and quite unattractive noises. Not that I needed to be attractive in the slightest around him. I just thought it'd be nice to practice maintaining public decency.

"How'd you get past my guards?" I asked curiously.

"I guess I'm not as evil as you think." He answered.

"No, seriously—how'd you get past?" I asked again, only half joking.

"I am being serious. I'm not here to hurt you Maya. I'm not here to gloat. I'm here to thank you, and to apologise. I know your friends must be seething. And for breaking up with your boyfriend and massacring your reputation, I am truly sorry." He said.

"If you really care about my feelings, then prove it by leaving me alone." I snapped at him. My tone was intended to be threatening but was instead botched by sadness.

"OK." He said shortly, then stood up and left. When he gently shut the door behind him, I _tried_ to resume my crying. Unfortunately, his interruption had disrupted of the urge and I was now forced to leave my tears suppressed, which didn't seem healthy. I fell back on my pillows.

I held up my hand, gazing at the ring. I hadn't really paid much attention to it after he opened the box, but God it was beautiful. The band of white gold, which looked better on me than any metal I'd ever seen, was covered with hundreds of tiny, sparkling diamonds. Including the flawless stone in the center, it had to be at least seven and a half karats in all.

Somehow, he'd gotten hold of the very image of my dream ring. The only thing that differed from the engagement ring I'd always imagined were the two emeralds flanking the marquise cut center stone. I tried to ignore the 'Slytherin Colors' part and focus more on the 'my birthday is in May' part.

Despite that small detail, the ring was still the most gorgeous thing I'd ever set my eyes on. I stood, magicked my tears away, and burst out of the room. Malfoy wasn't in the common area, so I walked as calmly as I could to his door. Even though it was open, I knocked on the doorframe to give him time to finish whatever he was doing. He did expect me to be holed up in my room, after all.

He came to the doorway and past me, beckoning me to follow him to the ornate chairs in front of the fireplace.

"So now you'd like to talk?" He began, but without is usual sneer or the signature gloating tone that was always present in his voice.

"Where'd you get the ring?" I asked, cutting straight to the chase.

"Uh, the store…" He answered, obviously confused.

"No, I mean _which_ store?"

"The jewelry store?" he clarified.

"I should have expected this from a man." I muttered

"I'm confused… what is it you want me to say?"

"What precisely was the name of the jewelry store from which you bought this ring?" I asked, being very specific to help him understand and talking slowly to annoy him.

"I don't know." He said, wrinkling his brow. "It was someplace in Diagon Alley."

"Are these real?" I asked.

"If you mean real as in 'in existence' it's no wonder you're not in Ravenclaw."

"I sighed in exasperation.

"But," He continued "if you mean real as in 'genuine' diamonds, the answer is also yes, but a slightly less obvious one."

"So from what source did you aqquire the wealth used to purchase it?" I asked, watching my wording so that he'd have a harder time twisting my words.

"I'm a Malfoy. We're loaded" He said, shrugging. There was no bashfulness in his voice. He didn't try to hide the statement in a mumble or a jumble of jargon.

"You stole from your parents?" I questioned for clarification

"Stole is a pretty harsh word." He claimed "I'd say I 'borrowed it without any intent to return it.' It's not like they care."

"And you don't think they may begin to care once they figured out what you 'borrowed' the money _for_?" I asked.

"Oh." He said. Apparently, the obvious hadn't occurred to him. Genius, he was.

"Oh" I repeated, following it with a scoff. "'Oh'? That's what you say? 'Oh'?"

"So what." He said "It'll only encourage my father to give me what I want."

"You totally just came up with that on the spot." I told him.

"Does that make it any less of a viable solution?"

"Yes." I said, even though it didn't.

"Whatever." He brushed away my answer. "It doesn't matter, since it's what we're going with."

"I'm going to my room." I said, standing and leaving. I fell back on my bed and slept.


	4. Chapter III

"_Shut up. I hate you!" She said, so loudly that everyone who was staring immediately looked away in embarrassment. _

"_C'mon, Lil. I'm sorry."_

"_Well, so am I. I'm sorry my family ever burdened you with our existence."_

"_Lily, you know that's not true." I protested quietly, keeping my voice even_

"_Isn't it, though? Al wasn't good enough for you. You didn't even bother to tell me how you were feeling, and now these 'plans' you were talking about end up being marriage to__ Scorpius__ Fucking Malfoy. I never want to see your ugly face again, you bitch."_

I woke up with Malfoy's patronus on my chest. It was probably the only way I would be able to wake up. The horror, the sadness, the remembrances of my dream were just too powerful to abandon without help. I just wish it weren't a snake.

"Thank you!" I called out, unsure of whether or not he could hear me.

"Welcome." He called back. His tone portrayed his fatigue better than any words ever could, and I felt guilty.

"Sorry for waking you." I said, and surprisingly I meant it.

"It's fine, Maya. Are you OK?"

"I think." I called back. "But… can you come here for a sec?"

"Ummmm, sure?" He said, curiosity clearly present. He appeared in my doorway moments later in a white undershirt and grey sweats.

"Yes?" He questioned.

I opened my mouth to reply, but realized that I had no idea what to say. I needed someone to talk to, but how was I supposed to vent to Malfoy about Malfoy? That's not how venting works. Usually I would have disillusioned myself and snuck down to the Gryffindor dorms, but that plan was screwed considering that no one wanted to talk to me at the moment.

"I'm so sorry to wake you. I don't know what got into me asking you to come. Never mind. You can go back to bed." I looked down at my intertwined fingers in my lap, spinning the ring around my finger with my thumb. It wasn't that hard with a rock so big it acted as a handle.

"I think you do know why you asked me to come. I think you want to tell me off, to scream at me for what I've done. So go ahead. You should let it out now so we can be convincing tomorrow."

"Fine then." I said, more awake then than I'd been since divination. "I want to tell you that you're a horrid person. I hate you more than anything. I wish I was never head girl or that you were never head boy. I wish that you're father wasn't such a D-bag to make you resort to this. I wish you'd thought this out a bit more. I wish you'd had the common sense to let me tell my friends. I wish you'd have at least waited until before Christmas break so I wouldn't have to be around you in the days following your proposal. I wish that I was never even a witch!" At the last part I gasped. Of course I didn't mean that. If I was never a witch, my life would suck. I'd be your average, good at nothing. Plain Jane. There'd be no point. No, what I really wish is that I never had to go to Hogwarts. That I could just have stayed in Massachusetts and gone to the institute. That I never had to meet Malfoy.

"You don't mean that." He said.

"No shit, Sherlock." I said. It was clear on my face that I hadn't meant it. I could tell, and I couldn't even see my face.

"Who's Sherlock?" He asked "Wait, don't answer that. I don't care."

I fell back on my bed and replaced Malfoys snake with my own butterfly, hoping it would hold up after I fell asleep. I had the vague thought that I must look like that Lunesta commercial before I drifted off.

"You know you're going to have to meet my parents, don't you?" Malfoy asked as we prepared for bed the next day.

I'd known it was coming eventually. "When?" I questioned. "Our next break isn't for a while."

"McGonagall was willing to give us a week-long leave, considering the circumstances. She got the second-choices for the heads' position to fill in for a little while. We'll be staying at the Manor for the duration of our mini-holiday. I've already got it planned out. I wrote my dad telling him about the proposal. He doesn't know to whom, though.

"I see another snag." I said, gloatingly despite what he'd planned for us. "You'll need to meet my parents first."

"The muggles?" He questioned, paling visible (Quite the accomplishment, considering that his usual complexion was incredibly pale to begin with.)

"No, my other ones." I said sarcastically. "Yes, the muggles, stupid."

"Does it have to be first?" He asked nervously. I grinned, finally feeling like the superior person in our fake-relationship.

"You know it wouldn't happen any other way. What? We'd get to your house, then say to your father 'Oh, by the way, we need to take a quick trip to muggle London while we're out of school. Hope you don't mind.' How well do you think that'd turn out, genius?"

"Badly." He admitted.

"That's what I thought." I said. "So we stop by my place for dinner or something, then we can go to your house for the rest of the week, since you seem so set on this plan."

"Manor"

"Pardon."

"I don't live in a house. It's a manor. Dad's really particular in that respect."

"Oooh, how fancy" I teased, then instantly sobered. "You're dad won't kill me or anything, will he?"

"Probably not."

"Probably?" It was my turn to go pale.

"Don't worry about it. Get on my mum's good side and you'll be fine. She's not as obsessed with blood status as my dad is. No, it's me who needs to watch my back."

"When are we leaving?" I asked, changing the subject. I wasn't willing to think about paternal filicide at the moment.

"Tomorrow, so go pack. I hope you have formalwear. You'll need a lot of it for seven-er, six suppers. Women in my world don't reuse their dresses very often"

"I have none at all! Who do you think I am- Bill Gates? I guess we can go shopping after we visit my parents. You'll be paying."

"I have no idea who Bill Gates is, but whatever. I suppose I'll need to exchange some gold for muggle money, then. That'll be an experience."

"Whatever. Any other necessities I may not consider?"

"Not really." He responded. "Just don't forget anything."

"Whatever." I said, and went to pack. As I transferred my books into my big trunk and a week's worth of underwear into my small one, I realized that Malfoy and I had gotten a lot more friendly within one day. I shuddered at the thought.

Soon, everything I needed (besides the dresses I didn't yet have) was packed into my small pink trunk, I began to fill my shoulder bag, which I used to carry things from class to class, with the things I needed for Ella. There was no way I was leaving my cat in the hands of some unknown stranger, no matter how good her grades were. If the fancy-dancy Malfoy _manor_ couldn't handle her, I'd leave her with my parents.

I fell asleep slowly that night, worrying what sort of medieval torture devices that may lay hidden in the Malfoy manor.


	5. Chapter IV

Complaints became commonplace during the flight from Hogsmead to Diagon Alley—so much so that I considered jumping off of my broom several times. Of course, I was never really planning on plummeting to my death, but it was a satisfying thought none the less.

"How much longer?" I asked, interrupting the long string of contempt that I'd been trying to ignore for the first time.

"Depends on the wind." He answered, civil despite the fact that I'd just interrupted the eightieth rant about meeting my parents that hour.

"I haven't told my mum or dad that we're coming." I said, just realizing the stupidity of it. He merely shrugged.

"What about our schoolwork? We're going to be behind." I said.

"McGonnagal owled my parents with the curriculum and said that we were to be homeschooled for the duration of the week." He said.

The rest of the ride was fairly quiet when compared to the first half. Malfoy stopped complaining, probably because he realized I'd stopped listening.

It was almost four in the afternoon when we descended through the thick, low-laying clouds and landed just outside Diagon Alley. The streets were fairly empty. I supposed that's only to be expected during the middle of a Monday in September, but it was odd all the same.

"Hey, Malfoy? I'm going to grab some ice-cream while you exchange that money, kay?" I said. He nodded, and stared determinedly at the bank, as if trading for muggle money was the equivalent of walking into a burning building. I walked through the door of the Fortescue's and sat down at a barstool in front of the counter.

It was again weird seeing Diagon Alley so empty. The sole customers were an elderly man and what appeared to be his young grandchild. The kid was chowing down on some pink and blue treat that was only going to give him a stomachache.

Angelo, who had been polishing tall angular parfait glasses, walked over to the counter in front of me. He leaned over it slightly, and winked.

"Why are you here?" he asked.

"Hello to you too."

"I mean, why aren't you in school? Did you skip class to profess your undying love for me?"

We often joked around like this. I knew that for him it wasn't a joke, but Al asked me out and we remained just friends. He turned to humor after that. I knew it was to mask his emotions, but if the playful flirting helped him cope, well who was I to take that away?

Oh, but God, that boy was attractive. There was no denying that point. If I wasn't dating Al, I might have dated him myself.

"I've got this week off for some extenuating circumstances that I'd prefer we don't talk about." I said.

"Fair enough." He shrugged. "Two scoops of chocolate-caramel in a bowl with whipped cream, walnuts, and rainbow sprinkles?" He asked, naming my regular order so quickly that the complexity seemed amplified.

"Better make it three." I said.

"That's a good plan. You'll have to stay here longer to finish it." He said, grinning at the prospect.

"I sure hope so." I said, glancing at the street behind me through the glass storefront.

"Do I detect avoidance?" He asked.

"You're good." I complimented.

"So who are you avoiding? He asked as he placed a bowl filled with ice cream in front of me. "Al? Did you break up with him because you could no longer deny the intense attraction between our two lovestricken (_A/N: Lovestruck? I couldn't figure it out…) _souls?" He asked dramatically, holding his hand over his heart

I didn't say anything, but instead took a big spoonful and when the cold stuck to the spoon I started to lick it off. I always ate ice cream like this, treating my spoon like a cone.

"Oh my God, you guys did break up, didn't you. I'm so sorry, Maya! You just had your heart crushed, and then I go ahead and rub it in" He said, then cringed at his previous actions.

"It's O.K, Ang. You didn't know." I said, giving up on the spoon licking thing and began to stuff my face like a chipmunk on a caffeine rush. Money may not buy happiness, but it does buy dessert. Close enough.

"So, do you want me to kill the SOB, or do you want to do it yourself."

"I'm not going to jail for him, Ang, and neither are you."

"I won't." He said, smiling in what he must have thought to be a devious way but ended up just looking goofy. "I know a few ways to cause 'accidental' deaths with commonplace objects"

"I don't even want to know how you know that." I said, scraping the bottom of my bowl with my spoon."

"They're theoretical. I've never done any before." He assured me.

"And you won't do it to Al." I said sternly.

"Either way, he's still an SOB." He muttered as he set down the parfait glass he'd been mindlessly polishing for the duration of our conversation and picked up another. I ran my thumb across the sides of the bowl, getting the ice cream that was out of reach with my spoon, and licked it.

"Well, after I realized that I found someone else, so it's good now." I said, smiling that fake smile I'd come to know so well.

"Already?" He asked. He quickly set down the second glass so that he didn't drop it. "I didn't take you for the type to bounce back so quickly from a break up."

I stared down into my empty bowl. "I didn't. It was going on before the break up."

"You were cheating on him?" He asked, stunned.

I nodded. There were no more tears, not like when I'd lied to my other friends. They'd run out.

"Who are you avoiding," He asked "If Al's not with you? The other guy?"

I nodded again.

"But… if you like him, why are you avoiding him?"

"I'm going to meet his parents." I said. I frowned. It was my fault, of course, that I'd already devoured the last of my sugar-ridden happiness in a bowl, but that didn't make it any easier to handle.

"Don't worry. They'll love you. How could they not?" He said, trying to cheer me up.

"If you say so." I said, making it clear that them loving me was out of the question. Just then, Malfoy walked through the doors.

"You finished?" He asked, "Because we should really be going."

"Hey hon." I said cheerfully. "This is my friend Angelo. Angelo, this is my fiancé, Scorpius."

"Hello." He said coldly, then turned to me.

"I can't believe you. How can you be engaged to the son of the man who's done nothing but made my life hell for the past eighteen years?" he hissed at me.

"Ang, he's not like his father. I'm muggleborn, and he proposed to me. Do you really think that's something his father would have done?" I whispered back.

"I'm shunned by almost everyone, Maya. I'm used to it. But Draco Malfoy would kill me given the chance. I'm the lowest of the low to people like him, and let me tell you that even your new boyfriend will not be able to deny such a belief."

"Ang, it's not your fault you're a squib. He'll see that. He has to."

"Just leave, Maya."

The tears hadn't run out after all. They'd just been dormant until that point. But with those words the flood began. I stood, but was unable to stay upright before I fell to the floor. This was it. Everyone hated me. There was no one left. Angelo, who'd been shunned on a daily basis since he was born, hated me. That was low. I was scum. I didn't deserve to live. I closed my eyes, pulled out my wand, and pointed it at my chest.

It was snatched from my hand.

I looked up to see Malfoy hunched over beside me, my wand in his hand. He hesitated for a moment, then wrapped his arms around my shoulders and pulled me close.

"I'm so sorry, Maya." He said into my hair. "God, this is all my fault. I am sooo sorry."

I gave no reply, not that I could if I wanted to. I was too busy trying to calm my shudders.

"Come on." He said, and helped me up. Up to that point, I'd forgotten that I'd been sitting on the floor of an ice cream parlor. The older of the other two patrons stared, but when I made eye contact he was quick to look away.

Malfoy helped me out of the building and, when I was finally able to support my own weight again, handed me my broom. I led the way to my home.


	6. Chapter V

We left Diagon Alley through the Leaky Cauldron. We had decided that the best course of action was to do all of our traveling the muggle way after that, so I hailed us a cab. To avoid attracting extra confusion, we shrank our brooms and secured them inside the regular sized trunks. After loading our luggage into the trunk, I gave the kind-looking driver my address and we were off.

As soon as we started moving, Malfoy cringed and practically cowered in his seat.

"You better not get sick back there." The driver, who the dashboard tag identified at Jameson Meriwether, warned.

"He won't." I assured him. "He's just a scaredy-cat."

Jameson raised his eyebrows questioningly. "That sounds like a story."

"He's going to meet my mum and stepdad for the first time." I said

He nodded understandingly. "If you want some advice, boy, keep your hands off of her in front of her family."

Malfoy nodded, looking queasy. "That's the plan."

"Good." he nodded and stopped in front of our destination, which we'd reached faster than I would have thought.

Malfoy had me count the cash to pay the cabbie, and we grabbed our luggage.

"I think it'd be best for you to wait here, at the end of the driveway, while I go explain what's going on." I suggested logically.

He nodded in absentminded agreement and I marched up the long driveway and to the front door, where I knocked loudly three times. Chris, my stepdad, answered.

"Hey, Chris. Is Mum home?" I asked, grinning. My mum did a really good job landing him. It was kind of creepy, but I had to admit he was really attractive for an old guy. He was never attractive enough to rival Angelo (I'd seen pictures) and was far from as smart as Al, but really nice. He didn't try to treat Harvey and I as his kids, like I'd been afraid of before the wedding.

He had Spanish features and occasionally slipped into an American Southeastern accent that matched my mothers. I don't think he could help it, since he spent so much time around her. She was from Tennessee and had never quite dropped the drawl. I don't know why he found it attractive, but he did.

At first, I'd been so excited when I realized that I'd be living surrounded by a bunch of British boys, (Who wouldn't be? C'mon, they're BRITISH BOYS) then I realized that the American accent epitomizes the un-sexy. Luckily, no one was as repulsed by my voice as I was, so that was a plus.

"Um, yeah." He replied. He turned and called out to my mother, then turned back to me. "What is this about."

Luckily, my mum came thundering down the stairs so I wouldn't have to repeat myself.

"The headmistress let me visit because… well… I want you to meet someone and she fully agrees with it." I said.

"A boy?" Chris asked uneasily

"Yes. He's waiting now. I'm sorry I didn't tell you I was coming, it was unexpected and really sudden."

"Oh, it's no problem at all!" My mother said breezily. "We'll go out for dessert."

"Mum, we haven't even eaten dinner yet." I said

"Come on! Don't be such a spoilsport! We'll get some Frozen Yoghurt at Lora-Lee's for dinner _and_ dessert. My treat!"

I smiled. It was just like my mother to ignore social rules. "O.K." I agreed

"Bring your things inside." She said, waving at Malfoy, who she'd just noticed. He waved meekly back. Malfoy being meek? That was a new one.

I went back to the end of the driveway to help carry our stuff.

"Be polite, please." I whispered.

He said nothing.

"Toughen up. It'll all be fine. Mum and Chris are really nice. You'll see."

We lugged our respective trunks to the front door and set them just inside.

"Well, come in. What's your name?" Mum asked, extending her hand. Malfoy shook it.

"Scorpius Malfoy, ma'am." He answered politely. He shook Chris' hand before letting his drop limply to his side.

I shifted my weight to the balls of my feet uneasily. There was a moment of awkward silence before Chris recognized the name. "Maya, wasn't this the boy Harvey and you complained about every summer since your first year?"

"Past tense, Chris. It's not like that anymore." I mumbled. He clicked his teeth disapprovingly but let it drop.

More silence

"All righty then, let's go." Mum said, clapping her hands. She practically skipped to the garage door. "C'mon, Chris!" She called.

"I'm not sure about this, Maya." Malfoy said once they were both in the garage.

"Oh, put a sock in it. You did fine." I elbowed him as we went to join them.

"Should I change?" he asked worridly, glancing at his attire. He was wearing blue jeans and a plain blue tee shirt, a muggle outfit I had to threaten him to get him to wear.

"Why?" I asked, confused.

"I feel underdressed."

I understood. Everyone feels underdressed next to my mother. She was gorgeous, there was no denying it. I can only hope to age as well as she did. The fact that she always wore these really pretty fifties style dresses didn't help.

I hadn't noticed, but she was wearing a particularly beautiful and probably new one. It was white with brown pinstripes, not overall unique or complex, but she pulled it off. Of course, she could probably wear a burlap sack and pull it off wonderfully. Sigh. If only I had that gift.

"You're not underdressed." I assured him.

We got into the leather backseats of Chris' silver Kia and buckled. Chris backed out of the driveway and headed to Lora-Lee's. They have the best desserts I've ever tasted. They hand you a cup, and you go to all these little soft-serve-ish type dispensers and put whatever flavors you want in it, then they've got all these candy toppings and a whole bunch of fresh fruit. They weigh it for you at check out, and you pay for only as much as you're getting.

So that's what we did. I got some cheesecake flavoured yoghurt, then covered it with graham cracker crumbs and finished it off with some raspberries, so I had the equivalent of raspberry cheesecake. I think Malfoy got the Reese's endorsed peanut butter chocolate and whipped cream. My mum got the plain vanilla kind and added every candy topping they had, and Chris got plain chocolate.

"Can I make this lighter?" Malfoy whispered to me.

"Huh?" I asked, not fully understanding.

"You know, can I charm it lighter so your parents don't think I'm a pig?"

"First of all, Chris isn't my dad, so as a unit they're not my parents. Secondly, it's better to be a pig than a theif. Third they won't think you're a pig anyway. And fourth, what do you even care about what they think of you?"

"A Malfoy always makes a good impression."

I scoffed. "Yeah, because that's what your father was doing when he ridiculed one of my best friends. Angelo hates me now, because of your dad. If that's what 'making a good impression' is, then I'm worried for your vocabulary."

Malfoy turned bright red.

"Just weigh it." I said, rolling my eyes and sauntering off.

He did. It ended up being a full seven ounces lighter than my mum's was, and I'm pretty sure he didn't end up charming it. No one thought he was a pig. I bit my tongue and miraculously was able to hold back the _I told you so_ that threatened to escape.

After a bombardment of questions about Malfoy during which his family charm was greatly appreciated, we once more gathered in the car. The ride home was spent with Chris and Malfoy trying to ignore my mother and me as we jammed to a Matchbox Twenty/Green Day mix CD I'd made the previous summer.

When we got back to the house, Malfoy was more than eager to leave. I however, was not. When Mum and Chris started dating, I hated him. Then, we bonded… over Guitar Hero. Yes, it sounds lame. I know. But it's become our 'thing' and now I don't ever leave the house for any extended amount of time without challenging him to a Face-Off. So I forced malfoy to wait, telling him that he may in face enjoy watching and even may want to play (as if)

So there we were, playing Linkin Park on plastic guitars, when he noticed it.

The ring.

"Maya, what the hell is on your finger?" He asked, stopping without even bothering to pause the game. I paused it for him before answering.

"Chris, Mum, Scorp and I are getting married."

Chris clicked his tongue against his cheeks. "Pardon?"

"You heard me. It's happening, whether you two approve or not. I just hope we have your blessing." I said, steadily but with a venomous tone.

"Maya, are you pregnant?" My mum asked. I'd known this was coming.

"No, Mum. I'm not." I said calmly. "We are in love. The fact that pregnancy seems to be the only justifiable cause for our union is just sad, and I refuse to acknowledge it." I crossed my arms over my chest.

"This isn't necessary, Maya." Chris said.

"Yes, Chris. It really is to me and to Scorpius."

"Leave this house." Chris said, taking my arm and leading us out the door.

"Chris… please." I begged.

"No, Maya."

"Mum?" I asked, my eyes meeting hers. While mine were brimming with salty tears, hers were—for the first time I'd ever seen—cold as stone.

"I love you." I said softly, as we left.

"Clothes?" Malfoy suggested?

"Yeah. We could apperate into the alleyway beside the mall. No one will see us." I replied. I took him to the shopping center via side-along apparition.


	7. Chapter VI

"I cannot believe I'm doing this." I heard him say incredulously. I was inside the dressing room, and he was waiting on a bench provided outside

"Which?" I asked. There were so many things that I couldn't believe he was doing, but what he couldn't believe I didn't know.

"Just… this."

"Yeah, well I've had that same thought multiple times in the past hour, and probably hundreds of times since you asked me."

"Asked you?" He sounded confused.

"Since you proposed to me, dumbass" I said rolling my eyes even though he couldn't see.

"Oh, no. I didn't mean that. I completely can believe the proposal bit. It's the shopping thing that's unbelievable."

I rolled my eyes again. Was he being serious?

I zipped up the side of the last dress I was trying on and turned to look in the mirror.

"So the fact that we're engaged doesn't faze you, but the fact that we're shopping does?"

"Pretty much." He confirmed my conclusion.

I analysed the black strapless cocktail dress I was trying on. This was the only definite yes of the night, but I was done. I was never one for shopping anyway. I hated trying things on.

I grabbed the hooks of the noes' hangers and opened the door.

"D'you mind putting these back on the rack while I try and decide about the others?" I said, handing him the dresses.

"Whatever." He rolled his eyes. I was surprised. I was expecting a lot worse. I'm not sure what, exactly, but nothing as passive as a mere "whatever".

I could only pick three dresses. There was the black one, of course, as well as a satin wine-red floor length gown and a short, blue-green halter topped dress. I knew that three wasn't going to be enough, but that was all I was going to get, thank you very much. If the Malfoy family didn't like that, it was just fantastic for them (and me).

I changed back into my skinny jeans and red tee shirt and stepped out of the dressing room.

"I need shoes." I may have been exhausted, but I was still a girl, and a girl never gives up the chance to buy more shoes, especially when someone else is paying.

"Can't you just wear some you already have?" He asked.

"No. I have plaid Converse."

I don't think he knew what Converse brand shoes were, but he recognized that they weren't suitable. I ended up getting a pair of black platform heels with a bow at the toe and a pair of gold strappy heels.

Malfoy paid, but handed me the bags to carry. Was I his slave? Well, yes, I decided. I was very much his slave. The worst part: I could have objected, but I had wanted to keep my reputation intact. So much for that….

We went back into that alleyway to disapperate over to the Malfoy Manor, but before we actually left I shrunk the dresses and shoeboxes to put them into my already shrunken trunk. When I opened it, however, I found a few tins of cat food. I had left Ella with my Mom and Chris, but had clearly forgotten a thing or two on my haste to leave.

"We're going back." I declared. "To my house, I mean."

"What? Why?" He asked, shocked. "They hate you."

"They're my family. They don't hate me."

"My dad is family and he hates my guts." He shrugged. I recalled the lack of reaction back at my place and realized it was because he was used to it.

"That sucks." I said slowly

"That's life." He shrugged again. "I don't really give a shit."

Awkward silence.

"Well, I'm not going back for them anyway. I'm going back for Ella."

"You really love her, don't you?"

"Plenty of people would go out of their ways to make their pets comfortable."

"It's not just this. Even when we're at school; I remember that one time in third year you were almost in tears that you had to leave her in your dorm."

"How do you even know that?"

"I overheard you begging Professor Longbottom to present your case to McGonagall."

My face warmed, and I could tell I was blushing. "I didn't have a pet in first or second year; you know that. It was the first time I'd had to leave her all alone like that. I was worried something would happen to her."

"Like I said: You really love her. Seriously, if familiars were actually real, I'd assume she was yours. I've never seen someone so in love with her cat."

"Filch and Mrs. Norris?" I suggested.

"I wasn't considering cases of extreme bestiality." He deadpanned.

I kind of felt bad for laughing, but I couldn't help it. The idea that the caretaker and his cat had been maintaining a… relationship was a running joke at school. I routinely tried to ignore it, but Malfoy's delivery was epic.

"It wasn't that funny." He said, cracking a smile.

"Yes it was," I choked out through my laughter, wiping a tear from my eye. "It was hysterical."

He rolled his eyes and held out his hand. "For Ella."

"For Ella." I confirmed as I brought us home.


	8. Chapter VII

**Me? Own HP? I wish. Like, seriously. I wish on the stars for it. Actually, I mostly wish for it to be true and for me to be a witch (James Potter Jr.'s unmentioned soulmate) But you get my point.**

We ended up in the front hall. I was hesitant to just pop back in (literally) after all that had gone down before, but we couldn't exactly apparate at the end of my driveway. My mom ended up killing the hedges in the back that we'd planted just after I got my apparition license, so there was no other enclosure to use.

My mom didn't even jump when the loud CRACK disturbed the silent house. It was almost as if she'd been waiting.

I barely had time to rake in her tear stained face before she pulled me into a smothering hug. When she pulled back, she was smiling.

"I'm just here to drop off a toy for Ella." I said, "Then Scorp and I are going to the Malfoy Manor."

"Please, Maya, just let me apologize and explain myself."

"Apologize?" Malfoy asked, confused.

"Both of you, please, come in." She waved us into the house. "Chris is still upset; he went for a jog." She explained his absence as we made our way into the kitchen.

"Why aren't you?" I asked, "Still upset, I mean."

"Can I get you anything to drink?" She asked, clearly stalling.

"Mom, I live here. I can get my own water." I said as I pulled a bottle from the fridge.

"Scorpius?" She transferred the question.

"No, thanks." He mumbled.

"Are you sure? Water? Coke? Tea?"

"Translation: Water? Squirt or Fresca? Sweet Tea?" I cut in before he could embarrass himself.

My mother laughed lightly, but I could tell Scorpius was still confused.

"Tennesee." I said as way of explaination. I grabbed him a water, knowing that everyone but my mom and I would rather stay dehydrated than drink Squirt and that our tea was made southern-style (AKA so sugary it almost feels granular when you drink/chew it.)

"I'm through with the proprieties, Mom. Please stop putting it off and explain why you were so angry."

She took a deep breath, then began.

"I married your father young, and very rushed. I didn't know him the way I thought I did

"Just a few weeks ago, you hated this boy. I didn't want you rushing into an impulsive marriage. I didn't want you to get hurt like I did.

"But I acted impulsively myself. I didn't think about how you weren't me, and that Scorpius wasn't Michael. The way you two interacted at desuppert was telling; ya'll really do love each other. I let my own experiences govern my reaction

"I love you, MyMy—more than the entire universe. You're my baby girl, but you ain't a baby anymore. And I'll support you."

I let out a breath that I hadn't even known I'd been holding and almost tackled my mother in a hug.

When I finally let go, Mom turned to Malfoy. "Tell your parents that they, Chris, and I should get together sometime for brunch or something." She smiled

"Will do, ma'am."

"We'll be staying at the Malfoy's for a while."

"ATM" she warned.

"ATM" I agreed.

Like a good southern hostess, she lead us to the front door even though I could totally do it on my own and we weren't even leaving that way. I handed her the cat toy before I took Scorpius's hand and he took us to the Malfoy Manor.


	9. Chapter VIII

**I don't own Harry Potter.**

O.K, so the Malfoy Manor was friggin hugenormus.

"Did you take me to your place, or to Bromdingnag?" I asked, sarcasm blurred by awe, as we walked down the stone-paved driveway to the front of the palace. Like, seriously: Palace. It was as if, all of a sudden, the term Manor stopped being pretentious and started being modest.

"I don't understand that reference." He said quietly, threading his fingers through mine as we approached his parents, who were waiting on the front… 'porch' seemed too domestic a term for a building that rivaled the White House, but I couldn't think of a better one.

"Cotton and Denim, Scorpuis. I raised you better than this. And _she,_" He spoke of me as if I were a stray cat "is wearing canvas shoes that have been dragged through who knows what and not even washed." He sneered in distaste and I recognized some familial resemblance

"Darling, don't be rude." Mrs. Malfoy nudged her husband in the side with her elbow before turning to me and smiling kindly. "Welcome to our home, dear. It's very nice to meet you."

"The pleasure is mine, ma'am." I said, trying to be proper-ish because this seemed like the place where one should be proper-ish.

"Call me Astoria. You're almost family, even if we have yet to truly meet each other." She grinned, showing perfect teeth. Like, if they took someone with perfect teeth, and then Photoshopped her teeth

"Maya." I introduced myself.

Astoria looked at her husband until he nodded curtly.

"Don't mind Draco, honey. He's a bit grumpy today."

She hooked one arm around my shoulders and the other around Scorpius's and led us through the double doors into an ostentatious foyer. Her heels clicked on the marble floor and echoed off the dark wood paneling. Once we had gotten a fair amount inside of the house, she stopped guiding us and let go. Instead, she turned to face us.

"Now, I'd prefer you wear shoes on the hard surfaced floors, otherwise we get smudged footprints all over the place. We've made the floor impervious to mud and dirt transfer, but unfortunately there's nothing to be done for foot-sweat." She sighed, and then brightened. "Most of the house is carpeted, so you shouldn't have to wear shoes all the time. This is a home, after all. Comfort is key."

I liked her. I hated to have to gain her disapproval. It would be made doubly hard by the fact that I couldn't just be a horrible guest. I had to act like I was hoping she'd like me while getting her to dislike me.

"Your home is so beautiful. I'm not sure how comfortable I'll be in such lovely surroundings. I may start to feel self-conscious." I laughed off-handedly. Or, at least how I hoped sounded off-handed. I was actually starting to feel awkward in my jeans and sneakers.

She seemed to have no response.

"Scorpie, dearest," She said to fill the silence. Surprisingly, the whole mother's love thing actually added an endearing quality to the phrase I had always found off-putting. "Do you mind helping Maya get settled in and giving her a tour of the house?"

"Sure, mum." He said without any inflection.

"She'll be staying in the daffodil room. No arguing."

He nodded, then turned to me to explain "It's at the other end of the house from my room. She wants us to keep our distance _even though we're engaged_" The last bit of the sentence was clearly a passive aggressive move against his mother, which I had to commend. It added immensely to the illusion.

"Oh, don't be like that, Scorp." I said, playing along. "You know my stance on that. ATM—abstinence 'til marriage. It's how I was raised, and even for you I won't deny that."

"It doesn't mean I like it"

"Too bad, love."

Astoria smiled, clearly comforted by my side of the banter. "I'll be in the flower garden if you need anything." She said, then turned and walked away.

"Nice move." He whispered in my ear once she left.

"Thanks, you too." I whispered back. When Astoria had been here, it had seemed natural to speak in a regular tone. But with her gone and Scorpius and I being the only ones in the foyer it felt wrong to use anything louder than a whisper. It had the air of a library or a museum. It was a place that needed to remain undisturbed by unnecessary sound.

"I think that's the first time you've complimented me in private."

"Don't get used to it." I said, embarrassed. "So, are you going to show me around or what?"


	10. Chapter IX

**Yello! I've become ****very**** re-interested in this story. It'll probably be finished by mid-June if not sooner. YAY.  
>There are a few scientological terms in this one. There'll be a footnote explaining them because I didn't want to interrupt the little flow I have in this story with ANs.<strong>

"Your ancestors are staring at me." I said nervously out of the corner of my mouth about the thousands of portraits on the corridor walls.

"You're new. It interests them. Anyway, it's their back stories that are truly traumatizing."

"Hmm?" I prodded. This seemed interesting.

"All of these people have had biographies written on them, most wrote their own autobiographies, and plenty of them kept diaries. I've been forced to read them to learn more about my past or something. Dad's not so proud of the more recent stuff, but take that guy, for instance," He pointed to a picture of an attractive man with a square jaw and dark hair. To be honest, he looked a bit like John Barrowman. "He lived in 1556, so his anti-muggle beliefs were commonplace and not taboo. That being so, I had to research him. Thank the stars Dad waited until I was 15 to make me study that one, though. His diary was detailed, and he had oneirogmophobia"

"Oh my God, I did not need to know that." I said, stopping in my tracks and almost barfing. The portrait glared at Scorpius for blabbing about his personal business.

"You know what that is?" Scorpius asked, surprised.

"I have an unhealthy obsession with phobias." I answered once I regained my brain functions.

"So do you have any?"

"Pardon?" I've explained my love of all things phobic before, but I've never been asked that.

"Everyone's afraid of something. I know that fears and phobias are different things, but it's more fun to say lygophobia than "Doesn't like dungeons"

I smiled widely. Like, really, really widely. "Not many people can make the distinction. Thanks."

"What scares you?" He asked again.

"I'll tell you mine if you tell me yours."

He thought for a moment as we continued to walk down the long, grey-blue carpeted hallway that seemed to be longer than the home itself.

"Patriophobia." He said finally. "Or Dementophobia, maybe. Both? I'm terrified that insanity is genetic. What if the Malfoys are rotten not because of our choices, but rather our lack thereof? My dad wasn't always as bad as he is now. He didn't care as much about all of this aristocracy crap when he was a kid. I've overheard my mum and my Uncle Blaise talking about how he's changed. About how he's become Grandad. I don't want to become my father."

I just stood there. He just poured out his innermost fears to me. He could have said he had Acrophobia or something. I myself was going to lie and say myxophobia.

"Scorpius—" I started, but had no clue how to finish.

"It's your turn." He pressed.

"Why are you so intent on finding out what scares me? And how do you even know all of these phobias?"

"Maya, there were about ten portraits within pointing distance. I chose Lestat Malfoy because his creepiness interested me. I like learning about what makes people afraid, just like you do."

"What are the chances?" I asked rhetorically.

He chuckled in response.

"If anyone ever was a Wiccaphobe, it was my dad." I started to answer. I couldn't claim to fear slime—not after he told me his truth. " When Harvey and I got our letters, and he flipped. My mom, well, you met her. She stood by us. When I got my apperation license, she was actually proud of me. We did this HUGE thing for Harvey's and my Sweet 17th, even though the milestone has no muggle value. But my dad-" I took a deep breath and closed my eyes in preparation for what I'd never told anyone. "My dad gave me Rhabdophobia."

"But Rhabdophobia is the fear of being…." He said in shock. The words came out slowly, as if trying to find a fault in his knowledge, before trailing off.

I nodded, feeling a tear on my cheek. Even when my dad was trying to beat the 'evil spirits' out of me, I didn't cry. I screamed, sure. I screamed so hard my throat went raw for days. And when I was patching up my brother, I felt sadder than sad. But I never showed any weakness.

And yet_, talking_ about it left me bawling like a freaking child.

"Oh, God, Maya." Scorpius said. He closed the distance between us with two quick steps and held me until I could pull myself together. And I didn't even care that he was hugging me. Earlier that day I would have shoved him away, gagging, but now I was just happy for company. "You O.K?" He asked, pulling back after I stopped shuddering.

I nodded, using one hand to violently rub the tears from my eyes, and all but blowing my nose into the other.

"How much farther until we reach my room?" I changed the subject.

"Four more doors." He smiled. "I know, it's a long way to go. After you get your clothes put away, I can get an elf to do the rest while I give you the grand tour.

We walked four doors down (Which was even longer than he made it seem; the doors were separated by more wall than doors should be) and he opened the door with a flamboyant sweep of his arm.

The room was, like everything else in the place, spacious. All of the furniture was beautifully crafted from deep walnut and the ivy carved into the four-poster bed and wardrobe was detailed by someone with OCD.

"I see why it's called the Daffodil room." I said, referencing the daffodil yellow on the walls and the daffodil pattern on the blue, green, and yellow area rug.

"Yeah, it's a bit bright. Sorry. If you like, I can put you in a more muted room."

"No, bright is good." I sniffled quietly; the remnants of sobfest 2.0 hadn't quite left me. "Bright is good." I repeated. "Bright is happy-making."

"Um…O.K." He said of my Pretty-Speak, not understanding the reference. "Do you need help putting your clothes away? The wardrobe should have plenty of hangers in it and all of the dresser drawers are empty. The faster we get it done, the faster I can show you the rest of the house, and the sooner I can crash. It's been a long day."

I checked my wristwatch—a sundial clock face that had been enchanted to show the correct time no matter the position of the light and had been mounted on a wooden wristband that actually used to be part of a barn. George Weasley had given it to me as a gift. He knew that I had a slightly retro side to my personality and exaggeration was his forte, as was novelty items. It was nearly 7:30, much earlier than my usual bedtime, but it hadn't been such a usual day. "Yeah, that'd be great."I replied. "I'm tired as well. I would, however, like to talk with your mom before bed." I re-enlarged my trunks.

"I'll get stuff out and set it on the bed, and then you can decide where it goes?" He suggested.

"Kay."

We started to unpack.

**YAY FOR BONDING AND COMMON INTERESTS  
>Yes, I know that, as an author, I should never point out or explain my use of literary devices. However, if I didn't I think this entire chapter would seem random. It's not. As I've explained, its main purpose is to provide bonding and common interests between our lovely heroine and our handsome heroher blackmailer.**

**As promised, the medical terms and their definitions.  
>Like Maya and Scorpius, I have an unnatural interest in phobias. It was started when I rode Acrophobia at Six Flags Over Georgia (I'm from Metro-Atlanta, so I go a lot.) Acrophobia, as you'll read later, is the fear of heights. The ride is aptly named. It's a 200 foot tall (The FAA requires a red light beacon) free fall ride. <strong>_dft. ba__/-2Fnk__**  
><strong>_**The video is not mine, because I've not yet been willing to risk my phone (Though I may chance it later this summer. If I do, I'll replace the link. And that's assuming the link works.)  
>However, it is a pretty decent video. I set the link to start in the middle because the beginning is anti-footage of loading and muffled instructions. I don't know exactly what there is to instruct; keeping your arms and legs inside the ride at all times isn't an option. There is no inside or outside. It's a floorless ride. You're pretty much exposed. The other drawback of this video is that this particular ride tech didn't sing. Usually, they'll sing Ring Around The Rosie through loudspeakers mounted at the top of the ride. Except they don't sing the word "down"—They demonstrate it.<br>And he's just looking straight down and straight in front of him. That's the ride spinning, not the camera.  
>If you can't tell, I'm obsessed with the ride. It is, like I said, what spawned one of my favorite pastimes.<strong>

**The phobias will be listed in the order of occurrence because I've decided it'd be too hard to alphabetize them. **

**ONEIROGMOPHOBIA: The fear of wet dreams (Hence the 'disturbing' aspect of the claim)**

**LYGOPHOBIA: The fear of dark, damp places**

**PATRIOPHOBIA: The fear of heredity.  
><strong>_Note: This is usually used in terms of hereditary diseases. In the context I've used it in, Scorpius is afraid of his own heredity, which is an entirely acceptable use of the term. However, it's most often applied in reference of people (usually women) who are irrationally afraid of passing on genetic illnesses._

**DEMENTOPHOBIA: The fear of crazy people, or (in this case) of being crazy.**

**ACROPHOBIA: I)A fear of heights that extends beyond the justifiable "I'm too young to SPLAT!" II) LittleMissDementorsKiss's favorite thrill ride at Six Flags Over Georgia **

**MYXOPHOBIA: The fear of slime and slimy things**

**WICCAPHOBIA: The fear of magic or sorcerers**

**RHABDOPHOBIA: The fear of being beaten with a stick. **

_**With this knowledge, I encourage you to reread that last segment.**_


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